Leaving.....

so i leave for st louis in 7 days and im really excited because i get to see all of my relatives but its the first time we're going to st louis since my great grandfather passed away. and me and him we're really close so when i found out that he was probably going to die soon i knew that i had to go out and be there with him so i flew out there and i could only be there from a friday afternoon to sunday night because i had school and i was doing horribly so i couldn;t miss any school. but i made the most of the few days that i was there. visiting hours at the hospital were from 8 am to 10 pm and i was there teh entire day. i woke up at 7 i got ready and ate breakfast and i went tot he hospital and i was in his room for the entire 14 hours. i didnt leave for lunch and i didnt have dinner until 10:15 when i got back to my aunts house. now i know it may be hard to understand but those few days that i was there with him i actually think that we became closer than we have ever been. the day after i left was the day that my great grandfather died. now something you need to know about me is that i could chop my leg off, and i wouldnt cry. i could get hit by a car, and i wouldnt cry. but when i hung up the phone call i cried for the entire night. the funeral for him was so surreal. he looked so different then the way he usually looked. when i saw him, laying there in the casket he was clean shaven, and dressed up in a suit. my grandfather would never have been caught looking like that. "its too fruity" he would always say. :) but just being there, was the most life changing experience ive ever had. so now as i start to pack my things i realize how different going to this family gathering/reunion is going to be. there will be a lot less yelling :) , alot more food left for every one else lol, but other than that there will just be aliitle less laughter from the whole event. so i dont know how im going to handle it. its going to be hard but hopefully great grandma will help me. we'll help each other.
I love you great grandpa- you'll live forever in my heart
Stanton Kyle Nickens 4/13/09